A while back I got involved with a fellow who most of my friends were a bit surprised to see me with. He was a relatively conservative person (in appearance and philosophy) and a bit reserved.....kind of your stereotypical nerdy guy. I, on the other hand, am none of the above (definitely geeky but not smart enough to be nerdy), hence the general surprise. We got along well and things seemed to be flowing smoothly.......until one day he dumped me. At the time he chalked it up to "not being ready for a serious relationship".
Then about 6-7 months down the road I received a voicemail from him wanting to get together. After breaking up, we really had no contact whatsoever so this was yet another surprise but I figured that perhaps with the passage of time, he might be hoping that we could now be platonic friends. Wrong conclusion. Turns out that he apparently had a change of heart....but not for the reasons that you might be thinking.
Basically he said that he had never really dated much and when we got involved a lot of his friends were surprised when they met me. So that got him thinking that since I was interested in him....who else might be interested in him? Suddenly he felt like his door to the world of women had been flung wide open and there were all these potential possibilities awaiting him. So he dumped me.
I do have to give him credit for disclosing that rather unsavory explanation to me.....it didn't really paint a lovely portrait of himself and it also didn't in any way get me to go out with him again but still it was a nice gesture. It did also lead me to mull over that particular concept because it does seem like the grass is always greener over there to some people. Why is that? Instead of feeling like the luckiest person on the planet, why do some people only think that perhaps they could be even luckier with someone else?
I recently read an article about whether or not men know when they are in love. The majority of respondents fell into the category of "Yes.....but usually only when under threat of break-up or after the actual break-up". In the same sort of ambivalent vein.....in the last few weeks I've received messages from three fellows who I dated at one time (why do things happen in threes?). I haven't seen any of the three in many months....perhaps over a year. Two were "I miss you....can I see you?" messages and the third remains a mystery. I know what you're thinking. Booty call attempt. Yeah, that's what I was thinking too and really now....are they thinking:
1. Oh yeah....I was THAT great that she'll definitely want to hook up with me again.
2. I'm THAT desperate....let me go down my entire phone list and see who says yes.
3. She DID have a bad memory.
This all makes me think of that Groucho Marx quote of not wanting to belong to a club that would accept me for a member. Is that what it is? If someone wants to buy my car for $1000 then maybe someone else will give me $1500? I think it might be a sign that I was never very good at driving in reverse.
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